My youngest daughter and I sat down the other day to plan out the calendar. It's her senior year and the days are starting to fill up with those special graduation events. As we went through the months, we finally got to May.
I instinctively wrote down Last Day TM. (TM is the school.) See I've done this for years now - actually for a total of 18 years I've had children in school. There for a couple of years each of my three children were at different schools, thus me having to add the school names to clarify which school was getting out. Talk about crazy schedules???
But the other day as I wrote in my calendar, I just sat staring at those words. I think it was another small step to me realizing that a chapter is ending in my life, as another begins.
Now, I'm a mom and I'm just going to say I HATE TO SEE THIS CHAPTER END! I loved being involved with my kids in school and watching them grow into incredible teens and young adults. But I can't stop this chapter from ending. I wanted so bad to erase those words and pretend my baby would continue on in school as I know it, but yet deep down I know nothing I can do will stop that day from coming.
To all you moms out there who are graduating your last child this year -- I feel your heart! We cry at moments. Bust into laughter at others, and still manage to smile through it all. We are fearful of this whole empty nest thing, but somehow I know we'll make it through it. (for more on empty-nesting read my article "Wings, Worries, and Worms" listed in the right hand column of this blog)
To all you moms who are graduating your first child this year -- I feel your heart! I've been there and done that. I thought after going through all the emotions of a graduation with the first child that number two and three would be a breeze, but I hate to say the emotion is just as strong with the others. Word of advice --just cry a lot now so you can enjoy graduation week with fewer tears.
To all you moms who have little ones who will be beginning school for the first time -- I feel your heart! That was a scary first step to take. But I would say slow down, enjoy it, be involved, and treasure every moment -- it all goes way too fast!!!So although this was the last time I would write Last Day of school in my calendar, my heart does wait in anticipation of what is around the corner. I know there are many firsts out there for us to experience together.
Yes, it might be the last - Last Day, but I feel a First Day coming on!
7 comments:
My daughter just turned three and she keeps asking when she gets to go to her grandma's school, who is a fourth grade school teacher. I will definitely embrace and take it slow now as she is just so curious to know "why she can't go to school yet" Thanks for sharing this.
Alene, you made me cry. You have such an amazing talent for writting. Thank you for touching my heart with your words of wisdom. God Bless.
Michell Gohlke
Alene, that empty nest syndrome is real. But we adjust after awhile.
Especially when grand children start coming. Then your heart is wrapped up again with a new phase of life.
I promise you, bu god's grace you will come through this. It may be with plenty tears, but tears are healing. Bless you, dear sister.
From the perspective of a daughter who is still close to her mother, it is equally as rough on our end. But looking back now, I never feel like anything has ended - I just transitioned to a new focus in my life where I seem to need my Mom even more because now the moments seem bigger and life changing. I would definitely agree that your First Days are only beginning!
Thank you all for your sweet words. As moms of little ones and big ones it's amazing how we can all relate. Blessings friends.
Today is also the last day of school for my third child. I have looked forward to this time anxiously but now it is here and there have many tears. I have had kids in school since 1988 and have been a single mom for the past 15 years. It feels as if I am no longer needed. I just keep reminding myself that I will now be needed in other areas.
Praise God, He has seen me through every step and He will see me through the empty-nest stage and the feelings of total loneliness. Through the tears,
Cathi
Cathi - I wrote this post almost 9 months ago thinking when I got to that last day it would be easy, well today is that day and it's NOT!!! I'm so thankful God will see us through a new season. He still has so much in store for our children, as well as for us. Tearing up with you!!! Blessings.
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